Unremembered
by Elegant-Mess
Summary: Severus awoke in a foul temper, with a splitting headache. Hermione awoke a groan and realized he had forgotten 17 years.
1. Chapter 1

Severus awoke in a foul temper. His head felt as though it were splitting in two. As he became more aware , he realized three things simultaneously. First, he could not see for the bandages covering his eyes and the top of his head. Second, two delicate hands were holding his hand, anxiously. And last, he was not in his own bed, in fact by the feel of it he was in one of the beds in the Hogwarts hospital wing. As he stirred, someone spoke.

"Severus, are you awake?" an unfamiliar female voice asked anxiously.

"Obviously." he sneered. "POPPY!" he bellowed. "POPPY!" he shouted again.

"Severus, Severus, please calm down. What do you need? Madam Pomphery is busy, but I can help you with whatever you need." The female voice said gently.

"What I need is for Poppy to get Dumbledore and McGonagall in here so I can determine how to best rectify this situation." He growled as he attempted to remove the bandages. Quick hands, gently stilled his irritated motions.

"Please, Severus, your wounds haven't completely healed yet. If you'll be still, I'll go see if Madam Pomphery has finished her rounds yet. I'll also see if Minerva can come as well." His hands returned to his lap as he nodded. He heard the rustle of fabric as the woman left to seek Poppy and McGonagall.

As he lay back and waited for the woman to return with Poppy and McGonagall he began to contemplate how he arrived in this mess in the first place. The last thing he could recall was a young man with red hair placing something in the potion he was brewing and then a tremendous explosion. His memory of the event, however, seemed fragmented and fuzzy. He was pulled from his musing as he overhead the frantic whispering of two women. As well as, the sound of two sets of footsteps approached his bed.

"Severus, I'm so glad you're finally awake. Here, I imagine you have quite the headache, take these two vials of potion." Poppy Pomphery instructed as she pressed the vials into his hand.

"The first one is for the pain, and the second is for the swelling." She explained as he quickly downed the two vials.

"Now, tell me, how do you feel?" Poppy asked gently.

"How do you think I feel? I'm sitting here waiting for you, being placated be someone I don't even know!" He snapped as he heard a muffled sob from somewhere on his right. He would have rolled his eyes if they weren't so completely bandaged.

"I know there was a potions explosion, but I am truly at a loss as to what what happened before or since that explosion." He tried to calm himself as he heard the muffled sobbing become weeping.

"Who, are you? And why are you crying? I'm the one who is bandaged and lying in a hospital bed! Poppy just tell me what the bloody hell is going on here!" He snarled. The weeping abruptly stopped as the unknown woman sat heavily in the chair beside him.

" Poppy, just get Dumbledore and McGonagall in here so that I can get this whole mess sorted out." he growled. At the mention of Dumbledore's name, both women gasped loudly.

"Did you just ask for Albus?" Poppy whispered. A third set of footsteps approached his bed.

"Did I stutter? Who else would I have asked for? He is the Headmaster!" Three female gasps came as he growled.

"Severus? Tell me exactly what you remember." Minerva McGonagall asked calmly.

"Well, hello to you too, Minerva. I'm doing fine, thank you for asking." He spat sarcasm dripping from every word. The with a heavy sigh he began to explain what he could recall. "My memory is disjointed, my assumption is that, that comes from the head injury. I was in my lab brewing some potion... I can not recall what I was working on precisely. I know that I turned around to pick up the next ingredient from the table behind me. As I turned back I saw out of the corner of my eye a red head reach up over the counter and drop something in my cauldron right before it exploded."

He took a ragged breathe and continued getting louder as he went. "Minerva, I am tired of those damned gryiffindor first years of yours screwing up nearly every potion I work on. They're even invading my personal lab now! I swear that if you don't get those damned Weasley twins under control, I will cease simply taking house points and given detentions, and I shall hex them both to Merlin myself!" With every word his blood pressure and volume had increased until at the end of his rant, everyone from the Astronomy tower to the dungeons could have heard him. He lie back, panting from the exertion of his tirade.

Madam Pomphery bravely spoke first, "Severus, you've been unconscious for nearly three hour and you have at least a concussion. You sound very confused, please lie back and try to relax, you've worked yourself into quite a state." She said trying to calm him.

"Three hours, or three years it doesn't lessen those Weasley twin's culpability for this situation... Minerva, I demand that you have Dumbledore expel which ever one of those brats is responsible for that explosion! I could have been killed! Where is Dumbledore? Why isn't he here yet?" Severus asked angrily.

"Severus, what is today's date?" Minerva asked anxiously

"YE GODS, WOMAN! What the bloody hell does it matter what today's date is?" He raged.

"I need you to humor me Severus. And actually it matters quite a lot." Minerva spoke softly.

With a great heaving sigh he growled, "It is Tuesday, March 6, 1990."

There came a small whimper from the woman in the chair beside him, and then a heavy thump as the woman fell to the floor. With all the fuss over the date he began to contemplate the meaning of it all. He proceeded to ignore them all, as he attempted to figure it all out. Of course, the lack of information only added to his growing frustration.

"She's fainted?" Minerva exclaimed softly to Poppy.

"Well, it's no wonder, with the strain and concern she's been carrying, as well as her condition." Poppy moved past Minerva to tend to the other woman.

"Her... condition?... Poppy, are saying?..." Minerva sputtered softly.

"Oh, yes, well, I'm certain she wouldn't have wanted you to find out this way. I'm sure she meant to tell you herself... Of course I only confirmed this morning." Poppy rambled on as the two women worked to move the third into the bed beside Severus. The two of them continued to twitter softly like mother hens over the third. And Severus was fairly seething in his own bed.

"Will you to stop twittering over that simpering little chit and explain to me what the bloody hell is going on here!" Severus bellowed.

"Poppy, do you think he is healed enough to remove the bandages now?" Minerva asked.

"Let me do a quick diagnostic spell and we'll see." Poppy said softly. They were all quiet as he felt the gentle probing of the medi-magic, and heard the soft swishing of her wand. "Well, isn't that curious!" Poppy exclaimed.

"What!" both Minerva and Severus asked.

"Hold on... You'll see..." Poppy said as she unwrapped his head slowly and carefully. Severus tried to blink to focus, as the bandages came away from his eyes.

"Oh dear..." whispered Minerva...


	2. Chapter 2

Hermione awoke with a groan. Her first clear thought was, 'Seventeen years, he's forgotten seventeen years!' then she heard Minerva whisper. "Oh dear..."

"WHAT?" Severus bellowed. Hermione gingerly rolled over on her bed so that she could see him, and gasped loudly.

"Merlin's beard! What's happened to him?" she asked Poppy.

"Where is my wand!" Severus rolled to his side, floundering with bleary eyes, and found his wand on the table beside his bed. Pointing in the witches general direction, his voice low and icy, he said. "So help me, if one of you does not tell me what is going on right now, I will start firing curses, Azakaban be damned!"

Again the mediwitch bravely spoke first. "Severus, now, we're all a little confused at the moment, but if you'll allow me go into my office for a few items, I believe that I can answer some of your more immediate questions. However, I do need you to lower your wand. Please?"

Severus nodded curtly and, as he lowered his wand to his lap, Poppy hurried back to her office. Severus looked up at a very pale and tired looking Minerva, as his eyesight finally cleared.

"Minerva, you look even more worn out than usual. We need to tell Dumbledore to ease back on your responsibilities. He's stolen your youth and propelled you into old age early! Or perhaps that is the fault of those reckless Weasleys!" he commented drolly. Minerva continued to stare at him, shock written all over her features, and remained completely silent.

"I take it by your shocked silence, that my previous poor looks have now gone beyond the point of no return." he half mumbled to himself. Finally Poppy returned, with a copy of The Daily Prophet and some other items he could not see.

"Severus, look at this calendar. Today's date is June 19th 2007. You are 47 years old. Look at this copy of The Daily Prophet. Three days ago you were interviewed by Rita Skeeter about your most recent advancement on the Wolfsbane Potion. And now look in this mirror." Poppy demanded.

His reflection stared back at him, mocking him. He looked no older than the thirty years that he thought he was. However with all the evidence that Poppy had presented him with he had no doubts that he should be much older. Confronted with all this information he began to think about all the possibilities of what could have happened. He was so wrapped up in his own contemplations that ceased to pay attention to the witches around him.

Hermione reached out and quietly took Minerva's hand. Shaking the older woman out of her state of shock, Hermione softly asked, though in her heart she already knew the answer, "So... this means he doesn't remember me... at all?"

Minerva turned and spoke softly to her former student. "No, my dear, I don't think he does."

Poppy stood over Severus. "Now if you're willing to be quiet and still for a few moments, I can do a few more in-depth diagnostic scans and we might know a few more answers to all of your questions." Still caught up in his own thoughts, Severus merely nodded. All four of them were quiet as the mediwitch began her diagnostic scans.

Hermione attempted to extricate herself from the bed. Minerva realized what she was doing and leaned over silently and helped her. Hermione stood, still feeling a bit off balance. However with Minerva's assistance she walked over to and sat in the chair beside Severus' bed. She sat in mute silence, (truly a rare thing) as Poppy performed her scans.

She watched as he lay back on the bed, his eyes closed, his raven black hair splayed out on the pillow behind him. The silver streaks that had started at his temples were now noticeably absent. The hard lines and wrinkles that had given his face such character were now considerably lessened. He appeared about twenty pounds lighter. He looked far less severe in his youth. In her opinion, Severus, had always been a fairly good looking man, and now with his youth returned he was even more so.

As she appraised his physical appearance, so many thoughts coursed through her mind. First, she was quite certain, he didn't even know who she was. Second, he had lost seventeen years of his memory, and fifteen to twenty years off his physical appearance. Third, his temper seemed to have lessened with age, and this younger man appeared to be, if it were possible, even more irritable than the older version.

As he continued speculate about what had or had not happened to him he felt as though he were being stared at. He knew on instinct that it must be the unknown woman. As he waited somewhat impatiently for Poppy to complete her scans, he wondered who this third woman must be. He cracked his eyes open a fraction of an inch, and watched her through heavily-lidded eyes.

She was small, quite petite really, maybe a whole 5"4'. Her chestnut brown hair fell to her mid-back in loose curls. Her cinnamon brown eyes were bright with unshed tears. She wore Hogwarts staff teaching robes. In the nervous silence she chewed roughly on her lower lip. Her face, her body language, and all her mannerisms screamed of concern... for him. He was greatly unsure of what he could have done to inspire such devotion from this lovely creature beside him.

As his eyes continued their cautious observance of the young woman, his eyes fell upon the rings on her left ring finger. He closed his eyes and lightly squeezed together the fingers on his own left hand. 'She is my wife!' His mind screamed at him. This new information left him with so many more unanswered questions.

"Well," announced Poppy, interrupting both Severus and Hermione's thoughts, "I've finally completed my scans. And while this isn't bad news it really isn't good news either. "

"Oh, out with it already!" Severus growled.

"Must you be such an arse all the time?" Minerva spat.

"Witch, if I were not bedridden right now..." Severus began.

"Will you two stop bickering long enough so that Poppy can tell us what is going on here? Please?" Hermione growled. After a moment of quiet, she turned to Poppy. "You were saying?"

"Yes, well, as I was trying to explain, because of the peculiar results of my scans, I actually did them three times to be sure. Whatever potion you were working on, in combination with the explosive ingredient, has permanently altered your age. Internally as well as externally, you are now about thirty years old. You will continue to age naturally from this point but from the scans I'd say you've cut off about seventeen years off of your body's physical age." She took a deep breath and continued.

"Now, as to the memory loss... You took quite a hit in the explosion. You have a fairly severe concussion and as a result you are experiencing Retrograde amnesia. Sometimes this can happen with a traumatic head injury. With this you have lost about seventeen years of memory. I believe, in time, your memories should return. Like I said, not really good news. Now, you have had quite a lot of stress this afternoon, and I want you to stay overnight so that I can keep an eye on your concussion. For now though, I think we should leave you to rest. I'm sure you'll 'bellow' if you need anything." Poppy finished, and taking the other two witches by the hands she tried to lead them away.

Hermione pulled her hand back, gazed at Severus, and pleaded with Poppy, "Please, let me stay, I know he doesn't ..."

"My dear," Poppy interrupted "I don't think that, that is such a good idea, he's already had so much stress today..."

"Poppy... If I promise to remain calm, can she stay?" Severus asked quietly.

Poppy turned, shock written plainly on her face and nodded. "Alright, but you need to remain calm and unstressed. Am I clear?" Both Severus and Hermione nodded. Then she placed a third vial in his hand. "I'm sure you still have many, many unanswered questions. However, you really need to rest. Please, after we leave, take this vial." Severus nodded. Then Poppy and Minerva left Hermione, sitting in the chair beside Severus.

They both sat in silence, unsure of what to say to the other. He watched her, again through heavily-lidded eyes, as she fidgeted in her chair. She alternately stared down at her hands and attempted covert glances at him. She seemed to be working up the courage to tell him something. She chewed on her lower lip so roughly he thought she was sure to cause her lip to bleed. Just before she spoke, he reached out and gently cupped her cheek, running the pad of his thumb over her much abused lower lip.

"You should not injure yourself so..." He said, his voice low and husky. Tears sprung to her eyes at the familiar gesture and with a sob, she flung herself, onto his broad chest, and wept. He wrapped her in his embrace and rested his cheek on her head.

Peeking though the small windows of her office Poppy and Minerva smiled. "You know, Minerva, I think that they're going to be alright." Poppy said.

He held her for some time, as she was overcome by great heaving sobs. Slowly her sobbing became whimpering and sniffling and then, as she seemed to have cried herself out, the slow even breaths of sleep. Gently he reached between them, pulled out his wand and silently transfigured the lumpy hospital bed into a slightly larger bed. Then he, careful not wake her, rearranged her body, so she was lying peacefully beside him. He reached out and brushed out a few errant curls off her face. Then he stretched out beside her.

Remembering the third vial that Poppy had pressed into his hand earlier he looked at it. It was a draught of dreamless sleep. Considering all of his innumerable unanswered questions, he knew that it he was sure to get no sleep at all. He opened the vial and drank it down. As he drank it down he tried to comprehend all that could have happened in seventeen years to bring him to this point in his life.

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A/N: I just wanted to say thank ya'll for such a great response to my first chapter. This is my first fanfic and I was more that a little nervous to try. I hope everyone likes this new one.

I wanted to also thank two very special writers, One, Vixen, introduced me to fanfic. I saw her trailer for Serpent's tounges and Lion's tails on you tube and then when I started reading that story on AFF I was hooked. And Two, Miss Figg, You showed me just how sexy a Potions Master could be. There are so many other authors that I adore but ya'll don't have time to listen to me ramble.

So again thank ya'll so much and if any one is interested in brit picking for me just let me know.

Thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Wow, I am so excited by all the feedback I'm getting on this. I love writing about Severus because I am blessed to have built in inspiration. My husband is like Severus in so many ways dark and sexy, brooding and sarcastic, dry humor and stubborn, and he's got the smolder too. But I'm also lucky He can be sweet and he will apologize when he's knows he's wrong. OK enough about how lucky a woman I am. A few answers to some of your questions... Severus is technically 47 but with the accident is now 30 and Hermione is 27 almost 28. They have been together 6 years and married for 4 years. I don't want to give away any more details so you'll just have to keep reading to find out more.

As the soft early morning light filtered in the windows, she snuggled deeper into her husband's warm arms. At some point while they had been sleeping, they were drawn to each others warmth and ended up entangled in each others' arms. Her head was pillowed on his upper arm, his face was buried in the hair at the base of her neck. He had pulled her back, flush up against his broad chest and his arm was wrapped snugly around her waist. As she stirred to check her muggle watch, it was half-six already, she sighed and pulled slightly away from him. He, without waking, possessively pulled her back into his embrace. She snuggled back, closed her eyes, and sighed again, today was going to be a hard day. He would have many difficult questions to answer.

Poppy came out of her office and saw the two snuggled together. She smiled and silently did a few diagnostic scans with her wand. Satisfied with the results, she decided to let them sleep. She would do her rounds, and later, after they woke and had breakfast she would release Severus from her care. With another grin at the pair she left to do her rounds.

He awoke to a small female form pressed back into his chest and allowed the smallest smirk as he breathed in deeply the smell of her hair. Her scent reminded him of a small flower garden his mother had kept when he was a child. Lavender and chamomile, a very pleasing combination. He stretched his long body with cat-like grace and pulled the woman's still form closer. As the draught of dreamless sleep wore off his mind was again, barraged with questions.

"I was wondering, Mrs. Snape if you would tell me your first name." he whispered silkily in her ear.

She gasped softly and quickly rolled over to face him. "How did you know that I'm your wife?" She whispered.

He cocked an eyebrow. "Ah, the powers of simple observation. You and I are wearing matching bands on our left ring fingers. And other than my mother, no woman has ever shown me the kind of concern and compassion, that you have demonstrated since I awoke yesterday." He whispered with a smirk.

"Oh," she blushed prettily, "Um, well, my name is Hermione Jean Granger Snape." she said with a smile.

"Well, add but a few more middle names and the length of your name would rival even Albus'. Which brings me to my next question. Normally the meddlesome old man would have been here within moments of any kind of major accident in this school. So where is he?" He said sarcasm beginning to leach into his voice.

Her eyes brightened with tears as she clambered out of the bed to stand and pace beside it. He reached out, took his wand, and returned the bed to it's original small lumpy state. She wrung her hands and chewed her lip, as she thought about how to tell him the difficult truth.

"Um, well..." She began. "He's ... um..." she tried again. She took a deep steadying breath, "He's dead" she finally blurted. She swiped at a few stray tears that had escaped, as she continued to pace.

His eyes narrowed, everything in her body language said there was alot more that she seemed unwilling to divulge. Raising up on one elbow he reached out and caught her wrist in mid-stride. "What are you not telling me?" He asked through gritted teeth.

"Oh, Severus, why do you want to confront the hardest and most difficult question first?" She mumbled to herself. She sat in the chair beside his bed.

"Why, must you drag out the inevitable? Better, to just tell me, and get it over with. How did he die?" he growled.

With a deep sigh she steeled herself. "I'm afraid I cannot just tell you how he died, I feel I really should tell you some of what has happened in the past seventeen years, so that you'll understand what led to his death ten years ago. He groaned. She then proceeded to tell him all that she knew about the years leading up to Dumbledore's death. He was irritated when she insisted on starting at the beginning of his memory loss.

He scowled when she first mentioned James Potter's son. He listened carefully when she told of all that happened with Quirrell. He smirked and chuckled darkly, when she told him about his 'duel' with Lockheart. He growled when she told him about, Sirius Black and his escape from the dementors in her third year(omitting of course that it was her and Harry who helped him escape). As she explained about the Tri-wizard Tournament, about the darkening of Karkaroff's mark, and his intentions to flee, Severus narrowed his eyes.

When he heard about Voldemort's return and the Ministry's absolute denial, his whole body seemed to radiate anger. As Hermione described Dumbledore's withered hand and the promise he made Severus make, he became quite still, he lowered his eyes and shook his head slowly. As her recitation of history narrowed to the events in the Astronomy Tower, her throat was tight, and her words choppy. Finally, she told him of Dumbledore's last pleading words.

"NO!" He roared, as he got up from the bed. He stalked back and forth, in silence, fury pouring of him in waves. Hermione had seen him angry before, yelling, in tirades that could frighten dementors, but this, this silent fury, was truly terrifying. What scared her the most was, she knew that it was all directed at himself.

He turned to face her, his voice low and raw with emotion, "So, in the end, Draco failed and I was the one to cast the Avada Kedavra?" She merely nodded, her throat so constricted with emotion she was unable to speak. "And Potter was able to destroy the Dark Lord?" Again she merely nodded.

"All for the greater good..." He mumbled, sounding remarkably like Dumbledore for an instant. His usual impassive expression dropped as she watched, raw naked emotion play across his features. The inner war of emotions seemed to take their toll as he staggered. Quickly she was at his side, to help him back into his bed. She knew, that before his memory loss what had happened between he and Dumbledore, had always laid heavy upon his shoulders. And now, to watch him experience that burden as though for the first time, was heart-wrenching.

As though sensing the need to alleviate the heavy weight of tension, Poppy arrived with the breakfast tray. "Good morning. How are you feeling this morn...?" The question died on her lips as she noticed the dark look on Severus' face. Placing the tray on the nearby table, she quickly rounded on Hermione.

"Young woman! What have you done? Did I not clearly state that he should remain calm! After all that he has been through..."

"Poppy," Severus growled. "She is not at fault. I insisted that she tell me about Albus' death." Poppy gasped. "It was difficult to hear, but it was better to get it said and done. Now if you are finished berating my wife, I would like to eat and conclude my stay in this lumpy hospital bed." He ground out through gritted teeth.

Poppy paled and stammered as she tried to figure out what to say to all of that. Squaring her shoulders she finally said, "Yes, well, I've done all the necessary scans, and once you're done eating, I would be pleased, for you to excuse yourself from my hospital wing!" She then turned and left briskly.

Hermione giggled, "I think your comment about her hospital beds being lumpy may have bothered her a bit." She stood and quietly arranged the table so that it was over his lap and placed his breakfast tray upon it. "I'll go get you a fresh set of robes for when you leave." She looked at Severus. He was scowling at his tray. "What's wrong?"

"This food looks vile. I'd rather go to my rooms and have a house elf bring me something." He pushed the tray away, and picked up his wand. "Accio Severus' clean robes!" He growled. "...go get my robes, indeed... Are you a witch or not?" The robes flew into his waiting hand. He stood and drew the curtain about his bed effectively shutting her out while he changed. When he withdrew the curtain, she saw that he had transfigured the robes to fit his now leaner figure. Imposing as always, he briskly started the trek down to their rooms in the dungeons. She followed silently behind, nearly running, trying to keep pace with his long strides.


	4. Chapter 4

For the past three days Hermione had felt so alone. After coming back to their rooms, Severus had exiled himself to his lab. She had spoken with Harry and Ginny to update them about what had happened. She had floo called them right after the explosion, but with Molly unable to watch the kids they hadn't actually been able to come to Hogwarts. So once again, Hermione sat alone, in his large leather armchair, wearing her night clothes, wearing a small blue tank top and a pair of plaid flannel night pants. She was nursing a cup of tea, wishing it was a glass of Odgen's finest.

He had spent nearly every waking moment in his lab, first repairing and cleaning up after the explosion, and next trying to recreate the explosion (with the proper protection spells up, of course). He was still every bit the sarcastic git she married, but now with the added complication that he seemed to be avoiding her. After three days and at least a dozen attempts at conversation, she was determined that he would not get away with an 'I just need to get some sleep' excuse. Tonight she would have the conversation that she had been so excited about the morning of the explosion. So she sat in his chair in front of the fire in the sitting room, and waited for him to come out of the lab.

It was nearly one in the morning, when the wards lowered and she heard the door to his lab creak open. She got up and moved to greet him. "Oh Severus, I'm glad you've finally come in. We need to talk." She said standing in the narrow hallway, blocking his retreat to the bedroom.

With a heavy sigh he asked, "Must we do this right now?" He leaned against the wall and pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and his forefinger.

"Yes. I've tried to start this conversation over a dozen times and every time you give me some poor excuse. I know that this memory loss and everything else has been difficult, but it has been three days and we need to talk!" She said firmly, placing her hands on her hips.

Drawing himself up to his full six foot stature, he glared down at her and spoke in a cold and harsh tone. If she had not known him so well she would have truly been intimidated by his stance. "I will not be bossed about in my own home! I am tired and I am going to bed! This can and will wait till morning!" He hissed.

She very nearly giggled. "That doesn't scare me anymore Severus. And I will not wait, you said last night that we could talk in the morning and then you snuck out to your lab before I even woke! I am your wife and I know you quite well and I won't let you avoid this conversation any longer!" She said on the verge of losing her temper.

He bristled at her tone, "You know me so well then do you?" She nodded briskly. "Well then you insufferable little know-it-all, you should know that when I say I am tired that is precisely what I mean. Now Get Out Of My Way!" He said in low and dangerous voice.

"No! We need to talk!" She insisted.

"MOVE!" He growled.

"I Will Not!" she shrieked.

He reached out so quickly that she had no time to react. He picked her up, under the arms, and moved her bodily out of his way. As he tried to walk past her to the bedroom, her small hand reached out and grabbed his left forearm.

"Severus, Stop!" She demanded. He snatched his arm back from her vice-like grip. Then he stalked towards her, backing her up, not touching her, but pinning her against the wall between his outstretched arms. Her breath caught in her throat, he had never been so aggressive before. He was dangerous and intensely sexy at the same time.

"You say you know me so well, then you should know better than to place your hands on me in that manner. I am not a nice man. I have been and can be very cruel." He spoke his voice low and husky. He lowered his face and buried his nose in her hair. Her breaths came in shallow pants. This was this closest to him she had been since the morning after the explosion. She had transfigured and slept on the couch made into a bed the last few nights to help him be more comfortable. She had missed him. Quick as a flash, she snaked her arms around his neck, and kissed him fiercely, her body molding itself against his. He instinctively responded in kind, pressing her bodily up against the wall. She moaned at the sudden contact, and he growled and tore himself away.

"NO!" he snarled "I can not do this..." His voice trailed off. He stalked into the bedroom with Hermione right behind.

"Wha... What?" She stammered, her mind still reeling from the intensity of the kiss.

"I can not be your husband." He stated coldly, his back to her.

"What do you mean, you can't be my husband?" she asked hesitantly as she made her way around to face him.

"I mean exactly that, I do not know what could have brought us together..." She started to interrupt but he stopped her with an upraised hand. He began to pace furiously up and down the length of the room as he ranted.

"I do not know and I am not yet ready to have that discussion. I am a solitary man. You have invaded my home, you have followed me everywhere, except my lab, talking and trying to make me talk about 'how I feel' about everything and I can no longer stand it!" he snarled.

As he paused, she reached out and put her hand gently on his arm and softly begged, "Severus, please..."

"NO!" He shouted, and grabbed her upper arms in his strong grip. "In a very short span of time I have found out so many distressing things; I have lost seventeen years of memory, I have married a former student, My body has been permanently altered by a potions accident that may have been intended to kill me, and I was responsible for the death of one of the few men that ever truly trusted me! It is more than I can bear! I need time to process it all. Which I can not do with you following me everywhere I go, checking after my every last waking moment!" He shook her roughly as he finished his tirade. His breaths came in ragged pants as he looked down at her, as though seeing her in his grip for the first time.

Her small shoulders trembled with sobs, her face was blotchy from crying, and her upper arms were bright red where he held her so tightly. Shocked by his own actions he released her so quickly that she fell to the floor in a heap. He backed away from her, and knocked into the desk behind him. Enraged with himself, he turned and sent everything on the desk flying with a great sweep of his arm. His hands splayed out on the desk, his arms holding much of his weight, his head hung in shame, he breathed in great gulps as though he had just run a long distance.

"Severus?..." Her voice was barely audible. He turned sharply and he heard her tiny involuntary whimper. She stood but a few steps behind him, one hand outstretched silently imploring him. "Severus... please..." again her voice was a breathe of a whisper.

"No..." He groaned and began to turn away. Without a sound she quickly closed the distance between them. Gently she took his face in both her hands and forced him to look at her.

"Severus," she began softly, "I love you. No matter how hard you try to push me away, I truly, deeply, love you." She said with such pure sincerity, he did not even need veritaserum to know she spoke the truth.

"I can not..." he began to mumble as he tried to pull away.

Gently, as though he were made of the most fragile china, she again brought him around, and looking deeply into his eyes she said, "Severus, I love you, and I understand that this has been difficult for you. I am sorry that I tried to press you into something that you were not ready for. I love you so much." He attempted to interrupt her but she gently placed a hand over his lips.

"Before you try to warn me away from you, I know about your abusive childhood, about Lily, and about the terrible things that you did as a deatheater. Even with all that has happened to you, you have been a loving husband, an ardent lover, and my best friend. I love you and, I know that as soon as your memories come back, you'll see that you love me too. But in the meantime, I'm going to give you the time and space you need to 'process all this'."

She stepped away for him and nonverbally summoned her wand from the bed side table. With a swish of her wrist she brought out a rucksack from the closet. He watched in mute silence as she packed items from her dresser and summoned other items from the bathroom, packing those as well. She then accio'd a sweater from the bedroom closet, and pulling the sweater over her tank top, she walked into the sitting room. Quietly, he followed her. She slid on her trainers and grabbed her cloak from the sitting room closet. She walked over to the floo and reached into the pot of floo powder and hesitated. She turned and walked back over to him.

"Severus Snape..." She said haltingly, unshed tears in her eyes, "I have known you for sixteen years and have loved you for last eight of those years. I have loved you since the All Hallows Eve staff party in 1999. While you sort all this out I've left a box of memory vials for you. You should look at them in Albus' pensieve or you could talk to Minerva, or Poppy, or even Albus' portrait. When you've 'processed all this', come and find me, I'll wait for you... because I love you." She turned quickly to leave before she dissolved into tears.

"Hermione... wait..." he whispered his voice low and choked with emotion. She stood still as he spoke. "Where will you go?" he asked so softly she might have imagined that he spoke at all.

Silent tears coursing down her checks, her voice thick, she spoke without turning. "I'll be at Harry's. Number 12 Grimmauld Place, London. I love you Severus, goodbye." She stepped into the floo and spoke clearly. "Harry Potter's house." Then, in a flash of green, she was gone. And in all his years Severus Snape had never felt so ...alone.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I plan on updating every Monday night. This week was a bit crazy I had out patient surgery and so I'm a little behind. I also try to keep about one chapter ahead of what I post and Chapter 6 was hard for me to write. Anyway, this story keeps growing. I had only thought this would go about 10 chapters but now I think I'm looking at about 16- 20. We won't hear from Severus for awhile, I sent him to my room for his bad behavior. Haha, anyway I wanted to thank a few reviewers, HarryGinny4eva, Darque Hart, Brandi1498, CeliaEquus, HeartMom88, JaneA0202, and KathAdrian. You guys have helped me so much with all your input. JaneA0202 this chapter is a little longer and KathAdrian sorry but no sexy Severus for about 3 chapters, He's going to be a bit preoccupied. Well on with the story...

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Hermione stumbled into Harry's sitting room, in a haze of tears. She dropped all her things beside the floo, sat heavily on the couch, and finally allowed herself to to be consumed with her tears. Harry and Ginny have been woken by the sound of the floo, rushed into the sitting room, wands at the ready. Upon finding Hermione, they both pocketed their wands, and immediately moved to sit on either side of her on the couch.

Much like an big brother, Harry gathered Hermione into his arms, as Ginny stroked her hair and whispered softly, "It's alright, love, we're here, just let it all out, it's alright..." Ginny continued to murmur softly.

Harry and Ginny's eldest son James had also been woken by the sound of the floo and shuffled quietly into the sitting room. Startled by what he saw, he asked "Mum? Is Aunt 'Mione ok? Is she hurt? Why's she crying?" Hearing James' worried questions, Hermione quickly sat up, and wiping at her face, she attempted to get her sobs under control.

Harry answered for her, "Aunt 'Mione is ok. She's just had a rough day and came to talk to your Mum and me. Now it's the middle of the night. Your Mum and I will take care of Aunt 'Mione. You need to scoot off to bed." Harry said softly. James looked worriedly at Hermione.

"I'll be alright Jamie, I'll see you in the morning." Hermione said convincingly. With her reassurance James turned and quietly padded back up the stairs to his room.

Ginny accio'd a box of tissues and handed them to Hermione. "Thanks," she mumbled. "I'm sorry if I upset Jamie..." Harry smiled at Hermione's nickname for James.

"He'll be fine, kids are resilient. Right now I'm more worried about you. Why are you flooing in here at half two in the morning?" Harry asked concern heavy in his voice.

"Severus and I had a pretty nasty row." Hermione said softly.

Harry's eyes narrowed and his voice took a hard edge. "He didn't hurt you did he? Cause I'll kill the bastar..."

"Harry!" both Ginny and Hermione exclaimed.

"Why do you always assume the worst about him?" Hermione asked sadly.

"Cause, I know he's a right stubborn git! Harry insisted.

"You know the same could be said about you sometimes. Mr. Harry James Potter." Hermione said with a small smile, as Ginny nodded in agreement. Harry gave her a look of mock anger, and tried to suppress a laugh.

"Who? Me?" At which, they all dissolved into laughter. After a few moments, Harry attempted to stifle his laughter, and finally he said, "Well as much as you 'love me' I'm sure you'd rather girl talk with Ginny. And seeing how I have to be at the department by 7 in the morning, I think I'll just scoot off to bed myself." Harry stood and stretched. Then he squeezed Hermione's hand and said, "You know you're welcome to stay as long as you need." He squeezed her hand again and leaned over to kiss Ginny good night.

As Harry left, Ginny scooted closer and wrapped her arm around Hermione's shoulder. "OK, he's gone, spill..." And Hermione did, she told Ginny everything about the argument, with the exception of Severus' rough treatment.

"I'm afraid with all that's happened, he won't want me any more..." Hermione finished.

"Of course he will. Did Madam Pomfrey say any thing about how long it should take for him to get his memory back?" Ginny asked.

"Not when we initially left. You know he was in such a terrible mood after finding out about Dumbledore, he just wanted to get down to our rooms, and away form everyone including me." She shook her head. "Anyway, after he disappeared to into his lab, I floo called you guys, and then I went up to the hospital wing and spoke with Poppy. She said his memories could trickle back or rush back in a flood all at once. But there would have to be triggers. He needs to talk about it or, look at pictures, or try to connect himself to his past some how."

She sighed heavily. "I was worried about him so I went..."

"...to the library..." Ginny giggled.

"Yes, to the library, and I found this book called 'Memory loss in Witches and Wizards'. I have to say I'm so glad that we don't have to rely on muggle medicine. I mean he can use legilimens or look into a pensieve or even talk to Dumbledore's portrait. Our photos even move. The problem is none of that can help if he chooses to isolate himself from everything and everyone who cares about him." Hermione let out a forlorn sigh.

"Look" Ginny said with a yawn, "Madam Pomfrey was pretty clear that his memories will come back, and that's what you need to focus on." There was a soft cry from upstairs, "Ooh, that'd be Lily, she sleeps straight through most nights, but occasionally she still wakes up and needs to be rocked back to sleep." Ginny got up quickly and went upstairs. Hermione stood up, gathered her things and followed Ginny.

As she ascended the stairs, she admired all the hard work Harry and Ginny had put into the house. What had been dark and depressing Headquarters for The Order, was now a bright and happy home for a growing young family. Ginny had even figured out how to get rid of Mrs. Black's screaming portrait.

One evening when James was an infant, his cries had set off Mrs. Black for the fifth time that day. As Mrs. Black shrieked about the filthy half-bloods and blood traitors that had invaded her noble house, Ginny lost it. She hit her with such a powerful hex, it blew through the portrait and the wall behind it. Staring through the gaping hole, into her sitting room, she realized that the wall that all the horrible portraits and house elf heads were on, was a non-load bearing wall. Within days she and Harry had the whole wall removed, completely opening up the lower level.

Hermione stopped and peeked into Lily's room. Ginny was rocking in the rocking chair, humming a soft lullaby to the ginger haired infant. Hermione smiled sadly at the baby. She and Severus had been trying for two years, to get pregnant, and had painfully had three miscarriages. The hex, she was hit with at The Battle in the Ministry, had scarred her internally and she now had difficulty carrying to term. Now on top of everything else she had to worry about... She began to tear up again.

"Hermione," Ginny whispered. Hermione had been so distracted by everything, that she didn't notice Ginny put Lily in the crib. "Hey, you look exhausted. Come on, I'll help you get settled in the guest room." Ginny said softly. Silently they walked down the hall to the guest room. "If you need anything just let me know. Sleep in in as late as you need. I'll see you in the morning." Ginny smiled as she left.

"Night," Hermione whispered. She dropped her rucksack on the dresser and draped her cloak on the chair beside the bed. She sat on the bed and toed off her trainers, took off her sweater and laid it on top off her cloak. She pulled back the blanket and slid down into the comfortable bed. Her mind raced as she thought about Severus. She tossed and turned. When exhaustion finally forced her to sleep it was restless, her racing thoughts becoming wild and frightening dreams of a lost and despondent Severus.

Much to early the next morning, she awoke to five year old James and three year old Albus jumping on her bed and chanting, "Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!"

"That is enough I'm awake!" She growled.

Albus giggled, "Aunt 'Mione, when you gwumpy you sound like Unca Sevewas."

"Oh do I?" James and Albus nodded vigorously. "Well then you'd better look out cause I'm going to get you, you little dunderheads!" She growled playfully as she rose out of the bed hands wiggling and ready to tickle. The boys shrieked in mock fear and ran from the room.

"Boys! Breakfast!" Ginny called from downstairs.

Hermione laid down and tried to fall back to sleep. After tossing and turning for fifteen minutes or so, she decided it was just not going to happen. She sat up and pulled on her sweater, Severus' rough treatment the night before had left handprint shaped bruises on her upper arms. With Harry's tenuous acceptance of her marriage to Severus, she did not need this one time occurrence to affect his opinion. She headed down the stairs and was assaulted with the heavy greasy smell of breakfast.

"Morning 'Mione!" Ginny called, with a smile as Hermione came into the kitchen. "You hungry? I've made toast, bangers, and eggs." Ginny asked, as she thrust a full plate towards Hermione.

Hermione felt herself turn green as the feeling of nausea began to build. "Uh... oh no thank you." She shook her head. Overwhelmed by the smells, bile rising in her throat, she bolted to the bathroom to empty the contents of her stomach.

Fifteen minutes later, Hermione returned to the kitchen. Ginny had already sent the boys off to play and was finishing up feeding six month old Lily.

"So how far along are you?" Ginny asked casually without turning around.

"Uh... Um... Oh... What do you mean?" Hermione stuttered.

"You know what I mean. How come you didn't tell me and Harry that you're pregnant?" Ginny turned and faced Hermione.

"Uh... I'm not pregnant." Hermione muttered, her eyes cast down.

"You are a terrible liar, Hermione. Why are you trying to hide it? This is wonderful news!" Ginny smiled as she picked up Lily to clean her up.

Hermione sighed "I wasn't going to tell any one till I could tell Severus. And I figured I'd wait until after the first trimester. After losing the first three..." A sob choked off the rest of her sentence. In a instant Ginny was at her side and had her free arm wrapped around Hermione. On her other hip sat a still messy smiling Lily. Hermione ruffled the little girl's ginger hair and smiled through her tears.

"I had suspected that I was pregnant for almost two months but I was so afraid of losing another baby that I didn't tell any one, not even Severus. When I missed another full period I knew that I must be and so I had Poppy check, and that was on the morning of the explosion. She told me I was already twelve weeks along." Hermione stated. There was a sharp intake of breathe from Ginny. "Please don't tell Harry. I want Severus to know before anyone else does." Hermione pleaded.

Ginny frowned "I won't lie, but if it doesn't come up I won't tell him."

"Thank you so much," Hermione exclaimed breathlessly.

"Well then, we need Severus to remember you, so you can tell him, now won't we." Ginny grinned.


	6. Chapter 6

Harry usually hated Mondays, all the paperwork that would accumulate from the weekend made him not even want to show up for work. This particular Monday was different however, he was half an hour earlier than his secretary. Unheard of. He and Ginny didn't normally fight. Ginny was the flying instructor at Hogwarts and Harry was an Auror, well, now he was Head Auror. Molly watched the grandkids whenever they both had to work, and so there was not usually alot to fight about. But this weekend he and Ginny seemed at odds the whole time. Ginny defended Hermione every time she went off her rocker. Hermione was so, uncharacteristically moody.

Now, with all his paperwork all caught up, Harry sat alone in his office, thankful for the quiet moment. Hermione had been at his house for nearly three weeks now. He loved her like a sister, but like siblings they were beginning to grate on each others nerves. With all the upheaval she had been through she was understandably emotionally erratic. Angry one minute, crying the next, at this point, Harry was just glad to be in his quiet office. While Harry understood, she was still driving him round the twist. Being the Head of the Auror department had some perks however. When He said, "I need some quiet" He knew he would be left alone, for at least a little while. Hermione was becoming depressed now as well, they all thought that she would have heard from Snape by now. Harry was at a loss, he surely would not be able to convince Severus Snape to do anything. Deep in thought Harry almost didn't hear the soft knock at his door.

"Mr. Potter?" his secretary, Mrs. Daw, poked her blonde head in his doorframe, "I'm sorry to bother you but there is a 'certain Unspeakable' waiting out here, and he insists on seeing you now." A 'certain Unspeakable' was their code for Draco Malfoy.

Harry and Draco had both matured since their days as rivals at Hogwarts. Now, other than their jobs often putting them at odds, they got along quite well, (though they would never admit it, they were almost, gulp, friends). However the Unspeakable department of the Ministry had always been a pain in the arse to the Auror Department. It was always a question of dominion and jurisdiction. Since Draco Malfoy had become an Unspeakable and Harry, the Head of the Aurors', Malfoy seemed to make it his personal mission to be Harry's daily dose of aggravation. With a groan Harry shook his head, he surely didn't need any more irritation, today.

Speaking loudly so he was sure Draco could hear, he asked, "Who is it Mrs. Daw?"

"It's Mr. Malfoy, sir" she responded in kind.

"Well you can tell Mr. Malfoy, he can go straight to..." Harry stopped in mid-sentence, as a thought occurred to him. With a broad grin that didn't quite reach his voice, he said. "Send him in."

"Sir?" She asked softly, unsure of his sudden change. Harry nodded as he schooled his expression to a look of mild irritation. "Alright..." She stepped back out, into his waiting room and Harry heard her say, "Mr. Potter will see you now Mr. Malfoy."

"Potter..." Draco said with a smirk as he came in and sat in one of the chairs facing Harry's desk.

"Malfoy, What do you want?" Harry said irritation in his voice.

"What, no pleasantries this morning? No, How was your weekend? Or, How is your son? Tsk, Tsk, Tsk Really Potter. What would Ginny say? Hmm... Well, alright then, I'll start. Good Morning, Potter, how was your weekend?" He said in a drawling voice, as he inspected a cuticle on his left hand.

Harry rolled his eyes, "My weekend was wretched, Malfoy. Again what do you want?"

"What's got your knickers in a twist this morning Potter? We don't always get on great, but you're being downright rude this morning." Draco said with a smirk.

Harry ran a hand roughly through his short messy black hair. "It's Hermione, ever since she and Severus had that row she's been at my place. She's moody as hell, snappy and sad and she's driving me round the twist! Oh bollocks, why am I telling you all this? What the bloody hell do you want, Malfoy?"

"You're probably telling me all that because I'm such a good listener." Draco drawled as he picked at a cuticle on his left index finger. "However since you asked so nicely, I came to discuss case # COS 50- 8/10."

Harry groaned, "Not again, Dammit Malfoy, that case has been closed for nearly three months now. Even your supervisor has told you to drop it. Why do you insist on pursuing it? The evidence was all circumstantial."

"I know the bastard did it! He's getting away with murder! Literally!" Draco fumed.

"And you're letting your personal feelings cloud the real issue, Malfoy. He's been cleared of all charges. Look, I hate the bastard too, but if your superiors find out you're still after this, you could lose your position as an unspeakable. You've got to let this one go!" Harry said firmly. Draco snorted in protest. Finding it the right moment to bring up his original reason for letting Draco bother him, Harry said, "Look, I do need your help on a separate case." Draco raised an eyebrow as if to say 'Go on'.

Harry took a deep breath, "It's case # SS 126- 20/5."

Draco sat up straighter in his chair, "That's my Godfather's case isn't it?" Harry nodded. "I don't see why you would need me to be involved, it seemed a pretty open and shut case." Draco sneered.

"Well it may seem that way but really it's not. See after Snape initially woke up, because of the timing of his memory loss, he thought it was one of the Weasley twins as a first year. Obviously that was not the case. Auror O'Reilly spoke with him the next day in his labs to get his statement, but she didn't press the matter. After I read her report I told her she needed to go back for further clarification. I think she was more than a little intimated by him. Anyway, she has attempted to speak to him four times since and he refuses to talk to her."

Harry paused to collect his thoughts, "I have floo called Headmistress McGonagall and she said, he's gone into seclusion since Hermione left. He's warded his rooms so that only the house elves can get in or out. And according to Kreacher, Snape hasn't taken any meals since Friday. He only demands that the house elves bring him more firewhiskey and take away the empty bottles."

"Alright, other than my obvious concern for my Godfather's health, I'm still not seeing how his case would be something I should be involved with. In fact my concern for his health, might make it a conflict of interests for me to be involved at all." Draco reasoned.

"True, true but your connection to him might get him to sober up long enough to talk to you. Perhaps he'll even permit you to use Legilimency on him. The truth is, I have very few Aurors who can do legilimency and none of them are capable enough to take on Snape. I need you for that task. If you can get past his barriers, you would be able to see who actually sabotaged his potion. Harry stated.

"And really as much as I want this case solved, Severus and this state that he's put himself in, concerns me far more. Mcgonagall and I are worried, and Hermione's... well... she's crying one minute, yelling the next, and then crying again. I swear all this with Severus has driven her nutters." Harry groaned.

"She's probably just over emotional because she's pregnant." Draco mused.

"No she's not." Harry said quickly.

"Hmm..." Draco got very quiet and simply raised an eyebrow.

"She would have told me if she were pregnant, Malfoy." Harry said with narrowed eyes.

"You'd think so, wouldn't you?..." Draco said with a smirk, he truly enjoyed getting Potter so riled up.

"How would you know that Hermione is pregnant, and I don't?" Harry was starting to get angry.

"Because I'm observant Potter, I notice things." He stated coolly, continuing to egg Harry on.

"Dammit Malfoy! You'd better tell me now! Or so help me..." Harry yelled, as he pounded his fist on his desk.

Draco put his hands up in mock surrender. "You are so easy to antagonize, Potter." He chuckled darkly. "Well you know that Astoria and I are on the outs, and Ginny offered to let Scorpius come over and play with you boys while I work. When I was over there last week to pick him up, Ginny and Granger were in ..."

"She's not Granger any more Malfoy." Harry interrupted. "She's not been Granger for four years now. Her name's Hermione Snape." Harry growled.

"Alright, alright, Ginny and 'Hermione' were in the kitchen, I heard James fall down. Hermione must have picked him up, because then I heard Ginny say to Hermione that she shouldn't be picking James up, cause she could hurt herself or the baby. Then Hermione said something about being in her second trimester so she wasn't so worried anymore. They were speaking softly like they didn't want any one to hear but obviously not softly enough. Look, if they haven't told you yet, I'm sure they have some good noble gryiffindor reason. Hermione probably wants to tell my Godfather first or some such nonsense." Draco concluded.

"Damn..." Harry groaned.

"Indeed" Draco agreed.

Harry squared his shoulders as though making a decision. "Well, that settles it then. You have to take on your Godfather's case. I need you to go out there and get him to snap out of his alcohol saturated depression."

"And why should I do that for you, Potter?" Draco sneered.

"Because you still owe me for that hex I took for you in case # OOTP 19- 28/10. You know the one that I took, cause you weren't paying attention, cause you were to busy flirting with Auror O'Reilly, the one I didn't report?" Harry said sharply.

"I wondered when you'd bring that up..." Draco scowled.

"Yeah well, you owe me Malfoy, look I care about Hermione and I'm sure you're concerned about your Godfather. I can't go talk to him..."

"Obviously..." Draco sneered.

"Gods, you sound just like him," Harry chuckled, "Well, I can't talk to him, but you can. As an Unspeakable, I need you to figure out what actually happened in that explosion. As his Godson you need to do whatever it takes to set him right again. He has responsibilities; He's a professor, with classes coming up in six short weeks, He's a husband, who's wife needs him, And now he's going to be a father as well. He needs to get over his self-pity and at least attempt to get his memory back."

Harry let out a heavy sigh, "Look, I hate to use such Slytherin tactics, but Hermione needs Severus back now more than ever, so do whatever, I'll say I gave you clearance. Just get him started working on this. After that, I'll call us even on that hex, and I'll even see what I can do about getting case # COS 50- 8/10 re-opened." Harry muttered.

"Granger's really that bad off?" Draco questioned.

"Yeah 'Hermione' is really upset. And the stress isn't good for her pregnancy. She's had three miscarriages in the last two years." Harry sighed and dropped his head into his hands. "We need to fix this for her..." I'm really worried about her..."

"Damn..." Draco groaned.

"Indeed" Harry agreed.


	7. Chapter 7

Shortly after Draco left Potter's office, he had both his supervisor, and the Minister of Magic himself arrive unexpectedly in his office. Apparently they had come to the same conclusion that Potter had. Sternly the Minister had reminded Draco how important a symbol his Godfather had become, and how this one case could make or break Draco's career in the department. An hour later Draco sat alone in his office, plotting his best strategies, for his meeting with his Godfather. Severus had always been a morose drunk, and Draco was fairly certain his Godfather would not be pleased to see him. With a tentative plan in mind, he finished off his paperwork for the day, ate his lunch and waited for Kreacher to arrive.

Promptly at one o'clock Kreacher apparated into Draco's office at the Ministry. "Young Master Malfoy," Kreacher croaked as he gave a low bow. "Master Harry, said you are in need of Kreacher's assistance today."

"Yes, Kreacher, I need you to apparate me directly into Severus Snape's room in Hogwarts." Draco said politely.

Kreacher paled, "The Snape, is not wanting anyone to see him now."

Draco smirked. "That's not surprising however, it doesn't matter, you will need to take me anyway. If he does become angry I shall deal with it. I am his godson after all, and I will see him today regardless. How is my godfather this afternoon, Kreacher?"

Kreacher faltered for a moment, unsure of how to proceed, "The Snape... is unwell... he has a terrible headache, and is in an awful mood."

Draco chuckled, "I am well aware of my Godfather's drinking. So he has a bad hangover?" Kreacher nodded, his large bat-like ears flopping. "Has he started drinking yet today?"

"Kreacher, just gave the Snape his first bottle of firewhiskey before he left." Draco nodded and reached into one of his side drawers and pulled out two small potion vials. Placing them into his coat pocket he stood, and walked around his desk, to stand beside Kreacher.

"Young Master Malfoy is ready to leave then?"

With a heavy sigh he turned to the house elf, "Please, just call me Draco. And yes I am ready." He straightened his suit coat, extended his hand to Kreacher and nodded.

"Kreacher will take Master Draco to the Snape then." Kreacher took his hand and Draco felt the familiar sucking sensation and strong pull from behind his navel.

When they came to a stop, they were in his Godfather's sitting room. The room was a disaster. Severus had, at some point, had a drunken fit of temper and truly trashed the room. Books were everywhere, chairs overturned, tables smashed, a broken mirror lay in pieces. There was a pool of dried blood near the mirror fragments, and at some point recently, he must have been sick to his stomach, for the room still reeked of the smell. There was a small box of what a appeared to be pensieve memories on the mantel of the fireplace. Severus sat in an undamaged chair, facing the empty fireplace, a half empty bottle firewhiskey between his feet. He was leaned forward, elbows on his knees, his head in his hands. He was an absolute mess. His frock coat was lying in the floor beside him. There was old dried blood on his hands and his dress shirt, that may have been white a week ago. The other stains however, Draco didn't even venture to guess what they could be. His face was obscured by the curtain of his matted greasy black hair. By appearance and smell Draco figured that he had not bathed or perhaps even changed clothes, since Hermione left.

"Gods, did something die in here?" Draco drawled.

Severus finally looked up and growled. With a squeak, the house elf disapparated. The pale young man, stood before him in an expensive tailored black suit. His appearance was familiar, yet not. His sharp angular face, stormy gray eyes, and shoulder length platinum blonde hair seemed out of place when contrasted against the costly yet, decidedly muggle, three- piece suit.

"Surely, you did not come here simply to annoy me, Lucius?" Severus' voice was gravelly from being unused.

Draco reached up and fingered the ends of his hair as he mumbled to himself, "Ginny was right, I do need a haircut." To Severus he said, "Please do not compare me to that arse hole, Godfather."

"Draco?" Severus questioned, quite taken aback.

"Ah, I see the firewhiskey hasn't addled your mind completely," Draco drawled, as he reached into his coat pocket. He pulled out the two small vials, took Severus' hand and placed in it both vials. "Sober-up potion and pepper-up potion. Both from my personal stores, and both brewed by you."

Severus took both vials and examined them with a leary eye. "The color on this sober-up potion is to dark to be my brew."

"Five years ago, you started adding coffee to the brew to increase alertness, I believe it was Granger's idea. You really have lost alot of memory, haven't you?" Severus nodded crisply. "But you recall the explosion. Odd, very odd."

"Why are you here irritating me, Draco? Surely you have more in your life than to be bothered with me? What is it you really want?" Severus asked with an irritated sigh, as he drank down both of the vials.

"What do I want? What do I really want?... You know your not the only one to asked that question today," Draco huffed in frustration. "Well let's see, I want my father not to have forced me into an unwanted arranged marriage. I want not to have been disinherited, because said unwanted arranged marriage failed miserably. I want the mother of my son, to be more interested in our son than in her own social life. And most of all, I want my Godfather, who has been closer to me than my own bastard father, to get up off his drunk self-pitying arse and be a man for Merlin's sake. I want you to stop hiding in your rooms, getting drunk and acting like such a coward!" Draco fumed, while watching for a reaction, out of the corner of his eye.

Severus dropped his head into his hand and flicked at Draco with the other as though he were no more than an irksome fly. "Don't call me that boy," he hissed.

Draco narrowed his eyes and squared his shoulders. "Hmm... You know Granger and I fought a lot in our Hogwarts days but I've really come to admire her. She's the reason neither you nor I saw the inside of a cell in Azkaban after The Dark Lord fell. She's absolutely brilliant, she's fierce in battle, and... she's got a rockin' body. Well, anyway if she's tired of an old coward" Severus growled loudly "like you, maybe I could have a go with the mudblood."

Immediately Severus was across the room. He pinned Draco against the wall with his left forearm nearly choking him, his wand making a deep imprint in Draco's neck.

Severus' voice was low and icy as he hissed, "You will stay away from her. You will never call her that again, or so help me, I shall make sure you never speak another word."

Draco began to chuckle, not intimidated in the least, he became louder and louder as his eyes began to tear up. His near manic laughter caused Severus to press harder, completely cutting off the younger man's airflow. For the smallest second panic flashed in Draco's eyes. He put up his hands as a sign of surrender. As Severus lowered his arms, the mirth returned to Draco's countenance. Severus stepped back, but kept his wand aimed at Draco.

Draco chuckled a bit as he shook his head and rubbed his throat. "Damn, Godfather, I really had hoped I wouldn't have to go that far, to rouse you out of your drunken stupor. Look, I didn't mean what I said about Granger, I mean... that word. The truth is she's the reason I haven't used that word in almost ten years. And honestly she's not my type. She's way to bossy, and after all... As a gentleman, I prefer blondes." He smirked as he straightened his lapel.

Severus shook his head. He flicked his wand at one of the overturned chairs, and set it upright. With a second flick, he set it adjacent to his own. He then pocketed his wand, sat heavily in his chair and motioned for Draco to sit in the other. Whether the boy liked to admit it or not, he was remarkably like his father as a young man. "So, you came to 'rouse me from my drunken stupor, just to reunite me with my estranged wife. Did you do this out of the kindness of your own heart, or do you own someone a favor?" Severus asked, sarcasm dripping from every word.

Draco sneered and crossed his arms like a petulant child.

"Now, there is the ten year old boy I remember," Severus chuckled. "So I take it, it was the latter case."

Draco nodded and stood. He began to pace as he spoke, "Actually, I came because the new Head Auror believed that my relationship with you might help your case to progress a bit."

A speculative look crossed Severus' face. "How so?"

A look of pride that could only be described as purely Malfoy in origin, swelled in Draco. "At present I am Briton's second best Legilimens. Second of course only to you, Godfather," he said with a slight bow. "The Head Auror believes that I am the only one between the Auror department and the Unspeakables, proficient enough to look at your memories of the explosion and possibly be able to get through your defenses."

"Honestly Draco, your arrogance is incomprehensible. Do you really think, that if the Dark Lord himself, could not even detect my use of occulumens, you would even stand a chance of breaking through my defenses?" Severus questioned, his voice low and mocking.

"No," Draco stated simply. He knew that he was being challenged and refused to rise to the bait. "The Head Auror and I both reasoned that perhaps since I am your godson, you might trust me enough to allow me to view that memory."

"The current Head Auror is a bleeding Gryffindor, isn't he?" Severus sneered.

"Yes, he is, and though we've had our differences in the past, on this occasion I felt his reasoning was sound." Draco sighed and once again sat down. "Look because of your memory loss, there are things at play here that you may not be aware of. Granger worked for well over a year to make sure you, and I were cleared of all charges. Because of all that came light through your trial, the Ministry has dubbed you England's second greatest hero. And second only of course to Potter himself. And while the general public and the Ministry are happy with your role of hero, there are over a dozen Death Eaters that are still alluding capture, that consider you a traitor of the highest order. Most of wizarding England however, is outraged that one of their greatest heros was attacked and that the Auror department and the Unspeakables seem unable to solve this abhorrent crime. Of course, they don't understand that that it is less that we are incapable of solving this case and more that you are being an uncooperative arse."

"Ah, hence Auror O'Reilly's anxious attempts to contact me..." There was an odd tick in Draco's jaw when Severus mentioned her name, as though he were attempting the smother a grin. Severus raised an eyebrow.

Draco sighed, "Have been reading the Daily Prophet?" Severus shook his head slightly. "Well, the Unspeakable Department is under heavy fire for this. Now even the Minister himself is breathing down my neck."

"So this is all about politics and pleasing the media?" Severus sneered.

Draco rose and began to pace again. "No, of course it's not. I only mentioned that, so you would understand some of the pressure that I and my Department are currently under to close your case." Draco sighed heavily and ran a hand roughly through his hair. "Damn the press, the public, and my department, I just want to find the son of a bitch who did this to you and crucio him into oblivion." Draco growled.

"Oh won't Auntie Bella be so proud," Severus sneered.

"Argh! Dammit Severus!" Draco yelled as he turned his back to Severus. Draco breathed heavily through his nose for a few moments, clenching and unclenching his fists as he struggled to regain control of his temper. This was not going according to plan. He turned sharply back to face Severus.

"Here it is. My job may be on the line here. I need to see that memory to solve this case. Your job may be on the line as well if you can't pull your head out of your arse, because you have classes to teach in less than six weeks. You need to fix whatever you screwed up between you and Granger, because she needs to come back and teach as well. I'm not some soppy romantic or anything but she and... uh she needs you. She loves you, misses you and you've pushed her away at a very critical time." Severus' eyebrow shot up. 'Shite!' Draco realized he was entirely to close to matters that were not his to reveal. "But first and foremost Godfather... You need a shower."

Something in Draco's tone finally cut though and caused a genuine reaction in Severus. The harsh defensive sarcasm fell away and he began to laugh, truly laugh. "Only a Malfoy would be so overly concerned about my hygiene. In light of present circumstances, it seems absolutely insignificant."

Glad for the uncharacteristic moment, Draco laughed, "Well, I'm certain you've not looked in a mirror lately, but you look abysmal, and you smell disgusting. I need to use Legilimency and I don't want to stand close enough to you to do it. I mean you really reek."

Struggling to regain his impassive mask, said with a barely disguised chuckle, "Alright, Draco for the sake of your delicate senses, I will go take a shower. then we will discuss my case in detail, and I shall permit you to use Legilimens on me." With a curt nod, Severus rose, picked up his frock coat from the floor,and left the sitting room to take his shower.

Draco waited until he heard the water start and the quietly called, "Kreacher?" With a soft pop he appeared in front of Draco.

"Master Draco, called for Kreacher?"

"Yes, Kreacher, I need you to go and get as many of the Hogwart's house elves as you can and bring them here to deep clean Professor Snape's rooms. He's in the shower now I would like for you and the others to hurry and do this before he is finished," Draco explained.

"Yes Master Draco." Kreacher popped away and not a minute later he returned with five other house elves.

"Sorry Master Draco, but these are the only ones willing to brave the wrath of the Snape if we get caught," Kreacher explained as the others quickly set to work.

"That's fine, just let me know if I'm in the way." Kreacher nodded as he and two others set to work on the sitting room. The other three went to work in the other rooms. As Draco watched, the three house elves seemed to clean in fast forward. They cleaned magically and manually. Everything, every book, table, rug, lamp, even the broken mirror, was repaired, polished and cleaned so the items appeared brand new. They had started in one corner and moved outward like a wave of cleanliness engulfing the room. As they moved closer to Draco, he attempted to move to one side to get out of the way. However, it didn't seem to matter which way he moved he was in some house elf's way. He stepped to the left and bumped into one cleaning under a chair, and then he stepped to the right and nearly crushed Kreacher's hand as he scrubbed the floor.

With a heavy sigh Kreacher stood grabbed Draco's hand and without warning apparated him across the room to a spot that was already clean.

Draco stumbled from the unexpected move. "Ah! Next time just tell me what you about to do!"

"Sorry Master Draco," Kreacher croaked with a wicked grin. Draco stepped back from the malicious little house elf. No wonder Potter had sent the little shite, to stay at Hogwarts.

Draco heard an angry shout come his Godfather's bathroom. "WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?"

He heard five pops as the other house elves abandoned Kreacher. "I'll go handle him, can you finish up the rest by yourself?"

"Yes of course, Master Draco. Kreacher shall be finished here in five minutes, and will return to the kitchen. Will Master Draco be needing Kreacher to return him to the Ministry?"

"No, that will be all Kreacher," Draco said as he turned and headed down the hall to Severus' bedroom. He opened the door to find a dripping wet, irate Severus, clad only in a towel slung low on his hips.

About twenty minutes earlier, Severus shed the filthy clothes leaving them in a pile near the bathroom door to deal with later. With a groan he stepped under the hot water for the first time in almost two weeks. After she had left he had continued to work in his lab, he was quite certain that he had been working on a Shrinking Solution. However work in his lab had only distracted him for so long. His first inclination was to ignore her and all the chaos she had brought into his life. She had slept on his transfigured couch. She had said that she'd done it, to make him more comfortable. He knew and recognized her attempts at conversation in those few awkward days before she left. Her attempts were stilted and one sided. He knew from what Poppy said that he might regain some, perhaps even all of his memories in time. Though he was unsure with all that she had told him about if he truly wanted to regain all those lost years of memories. The things she had said, the way that she looked at him, it was at the time, greatly unnerving, but the more he thought about it the more he questioned everything. Her absolute certainty that if he were to regain his memories his would be in love with her, had shaken him. He was still in love with Lily... wasn't he? Lily, who had abandoned him after his terrible mistake. This young woman... this Hermione, seemed to love and cherish him even though she knew of his past. She cared for him even after his cold and callous treatment of her.

He lathered the shampoo and rubbed it into his scalp. He stood in the near silence of the shower, the constant thrum of the water a calming white noise. Heavy steam wafted through the small room allowing him the illusion of complete solitude. He turned his face into the water and enjoyed the simple pleasure of the heat cascading down his lean frame. It rippled down his broad shoulders, down his heavily scarred back. He ran his hands though his hair pushing the suds down his neck. Satisfied the shampoo was fully rinsed, he turned to pick up his bar of soap and nearly stepped on a small house elf scrubbing his bathtub.

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?" Severus roared. The house elf turned and stared in abject terror, to see Severus reaching down to grab him. Wisely the house elf apparated away before Severus caught ahold of him.

He reached past the glass shower door for a towel and turned off the water. He wrapped the towel around his hips and stormed out to find and confront Draco. He got no further than his bedroom door before godson came into his room. "Would you care to explain to me why I nearly stepped on a house elf ... in my shower?" Severus silenced Draco's attempted answer with an angry glare. "Do you realize how beyond angry Hermione would be if she were to find out that there was a house elf in here cleaning our quarters?" Severus raged.

Draco's only response was a very un-Malfoy like dumbfounded expression.


	8. Chapter 8

Time

What is time?

And memory

What is memory?

Seeing- being blindfolded

Recognition- Remembering

by Salvamea

Hermione closed her favorite poetry book and laid it on her lap. It was finally quiet in Grimmauld Place. She sat in Harry's favorite armchair, alone for the first time in nearly four weeks. Harry was at work, the little ones were with Molly at the burrow, and Ginny was visiting George in St. Mungo's. Two days earlier George had been experimenting on a new line of pranks and one of them backfired on him. Fortunately the there was little damage to anything except George, who now sported an odd blue-green talking mass on his shoulder. Irritating, ugly, but ultimately painless, the mass was proving difficult for the healers in the Spell Damage ward to remove.

Hermione sat in the quiet, listening to the soft strains of music as it drifted from the wizarding wireless. It was something distinctly Celtic and soothing. As the final notes of the song played out she sighed heavily. She was now seventeen weeks along in her pregnancy, nearly half-way through. She had gone to see Poppy last week for a check-up and Poppy had happily told her that she believed that she was at a much safer time in her pregnancy. She was still considered high-risk but, barring unforseen problems, she would likely be able to carry this child to full term. While she was absolutely thrilled with the news, it also served to deepen her depression. This would have been news she and Severus could have rejoiced in. However, Severus had made it abundantly clear that he could not consider himself her husband. As her heart broke she knew that she could not force his love or affection by telling him of their child. As difficult as the memory loss was for him, she knew her continued presence would only serve to antagonize him further. She had hoped that by leaving him alone he could work out his frustrations and begin the healing process. She knew that given time, as his memories returned, he would remember the love they shared. However, according to Harry, who had Kreacher keeping an eye on Severus for them, he was not doing well. It wasn't truly surprising, he had retreated from the world into a firewhiskey bottle before. It had been over three weeks since she had last spoken to Severus. There were only about six weeks till the start of term. She was truly unsure of what to do. She was the Transfiguration Professor at Hogwarts and was expected to be at the school preparing her classroom and curriculum in two short weeks. She couldn't go back to her rooms with Severus yet, he wasn't ready. Of course should it become necessary, Minerva would allow her to temporarily move back into the Transfiguration Professor's quarters. It had been over five years since she had lived in those rooms. So much had happened there; tears, laughter, the fights, and celebrations, endings and new beginnings.

* * *

_Saturday October 30, 1999..._

_'Damn that Rita Skeeter!' Hermione was of half a mind to storm into her office at the Daily Prophet, grab her by the hair and drag her meddling arse to the Ministry and tell the whole wizarding world that Skeeter was an unregistered animagus. Hermione knew that Skeeter held a grudge against her, but this went beyond the reporter's normal disparaging of her character. It seemed that since Hermione gave no reaction to Rita's article last week that she turned her lying quill on Ron and Hermione's relationship instead._

_Last week, the title of Skeeter's gossip column was:_

_Hermione Granger and Not-so-reformed Death Eater Severus Snape Maybe Plotting to Take Over the Ministry of Magic and Resurrect The Dark Lord! _

_Hermione, of course had responded to any questions the same as she always had, by telling anyone who asked, that Rita Skeeter was a daft dimbo and so was anyone who was foolish enough to believe the rubbish Skeeter falsely called news. So Hermione's non-reaction must have been what prompted today's Daily Prophet front page headline: _

_Is the Golden Trio Falling Apart?_

_The article went on to claim that Ron was flagrantly cheating on Hermione, that Harry was helping him cover and Hermione, the supposed brains of the trio, was woefully oblivious. Hermione was an emotional wreck, normally Rita's bile didn't faze her, but this cut to close to home. She and Ron had been growing apart lately and she had wondered at times... She shook her head, she really needed to talk to Harry. Hopefully there was no truth to the article but at least she knew Harry couldn't lie to her, whereas Ron might try. Over the last year and a half since the final battle she and Harry had grown closer. They now were as close as siblings; They teased each other like siblings, They fought like siblings, But most importantly, they loved each other like siblings. Now, she and Harry were so close she could read his every tell. He couldn't lie to her. _

_"_"_Harry?_" _she called through the floo. _"_Harry, are you busy? Can we talk?_" _Harry had been pacing angrily in his sitting room, the newspaper balled up in his fist, when Hermione's head had popped through the green flames. _

_Knowing her early morning floo-call was likely because of the distressing article he replied, _"_Hermione, Ron would never do that to you. And even if he did, I would never lie to you or cover up for him like that. Anyways, you know all she ever writes is lies right?_" _Hermione nodded. _"_She's gone to far this time though! I swear I'm going to drag her to Kingsley and have her held without bond for being an unregistered animagus!_" _Harry growled, turned towards Hermione, and seeing the look on her face he said with a sigh, _"_Back up, I'm coming over._"

_Hermione quickly exited the floo and stood up. Harry came through to Hermione's sitting room. Thankfully as a Professor, Hermione had a private floo in her quarters. Harry paced in a small circle in front of the floo. Hermione had read the paper with her morning tea and not yet dressed for the day. Her hair was a mess and she was wearing a small blue camisole and blue flannel pyjama shorts riding low on her hips. She sat on her sofa tearing the article in question into miniscule pieces, tears filling her eyes. A single drop fell from the corner of her eye and trekked it's way down her cheek. _

"_Harry... What if she's not lying this time?_" _Hermione whispered._

_Immediately Harry was kneeling down in front of her, she looked so lost, so far from the strong confidant young witch he had come to love like a sister. Taking her hands gently in his own, he asked softly, _"_Oh Hermione, of course she's lying. Why would you even ask such a question?_"

_With a heavy shuddering sigh that set loose more tears she whispered brokenly, _"_There have been alot of little things. Stuff I've tried to overlook. Stuff I wanted to pretend I couldn't see. There was a Quidditch practice that he had to rush of to, that his mate Adams, from the team, later mentioned had been canceled. There was the time he was going to visit his Mum to help with some of you and Ginny's wedding stuff. Later that evening I floo-called the Burrow to ask him a question and Molly said she hadn't heard from nor seen him in almost two weeks. But the worst one, was the stray pair of knickers in his Quidditch stuff. He said they must have become entangled in his things when Adams hired a stripper for their Victory party earlier this season._" _Hermione shook her head. _"_When I first read that article I was furious that she would print such lies, but the more I think about it the more I'm certain that I have been fooling myself the whole time._"

_Harry stood and began to pace again. _"_How long?_" _he asked quietly. Hermione covered her face with her hands and mumbled into her palms. Harry couldn't understand her muffled reply. _"_What?_"

_With a heavy sigh she moved her hands and whispered,_ "S_ince shortly after he signed on with the Cannons as Keeper._"

"_Damn it Hermione! Why didn't you say something before? Ten months? You"'ve let this go since January? You know I'm an Auror, I have connections. I could have checked for you._" _Harry's voice softened, _"_I can still check for you, if you want..._"

_Hermione just shook her head. _"_No, no, I don't want you to check. I just want it all to be lies. The article, the knickers, everything, I just want to pretend none of it ever happened. I just want it all to go away, because if it did happen, I just don't know if I can get past it. Ron and I have had so many other problems. We've been fighting, and I know that's nothing new, but this is different. We have such different goals. He wants a little wife, at home, barefoot, and pregnant, like his mum. I love Molly but I don't want that. I absolutely adore teaching. Hogwarts is home to me, I can do all the research I want. I have the opportunity to mold and shape young minds. He wants me to quit after we get married. I can't, but he doesn't seem to care. It's just too hard. I have had my suspicions for so long, he seemed to be pulling away from me, and we've been fighting so much. We don't see each other for weeks on end and then when we do see each other all we do is argue. The fights have become so much crueler. I don't want to fight anymore. I've thought about breaking it off with him, but it's like everyone expects us to be together. Do I stay with him; if I don't love him like that, if he's cheating on me. Do I break up with him; if I don't really know what else to do, if I may end up alone for the rest of my life. I just don't know what to do._" _Looking up at him in anguish, tears rolling down her cheeks, her heart broken, she pleaded, _"_Harry, what am I supposed to do...?_" _She began to sob brokenly._

_Harry sat down beside her and gathered her into his arms. He rubbed her back in slow soothing circles and whispered, _"_It's all going to work out, we'll get through this together._" _She shuddered and shook as she poured out her heartache in tears. Hermione's grief triggered something fraternal, protective in Harry. Suddenly instead of wanting to help his two best friends work their relationship out, he just wanted to tear Ron limb from limb. He wanted to make Ron hurt for all the pain he had caused her. Harry held her as she wept, rocking her, whispering soothing things in her ear. Slowly the pent up tension in her body began to abate as she fell into a fitful sleep. She shivered as she slept. Harry pulled the blanket from the back of the sofa and draped it over her body._

_Harry mumbled softly, _"_Ron was never the right guy for you. He's not smart enough, you need someone who can challenge you. He doesn't deserve you. I'm going to help find that right man for you I promise._"

_As Harry held her still trembling form, someone knocked on the door to her quarters. Assuming it was Ginny, and not wanting to move or call out and wake her, he pulled out his wand, and flicked it at the door to open it. When no one immediately entered, Harry raised his wand. A moment later Severus Snape silently walked in, his wand also raised, his face a grim mask of concern. Upon finding Hermione asleep in Harry's arms, he scowled and lowered his wand, as did Harry._

"_What are you doing here?_" _they both asked. Snape ached an eyebrow and Harry answered first._

"_Hermione was really upset and she needed me. I don't know if you've had a chance to read the Prophet this morning but it's bad, real bad. She was really upset and she cried herself to sleep, but I have it handled._" _Harry sighed heavily. _"_Wait a minute, what are you doing here?_"

"_I found it odd that Professor Granger had not come down to breakfast yet. When Filius was finished reading his copy of the Prophet, he handed it to me. After reading some of Skeeter's tripe, I ascertained that the article was likely the cause of Professor Granger's absence from breakfast. I came up here to inquire after her wellbeing, and to offer my assistance in brewing some Veritaserum, or perhaps an untraceable poison._" _Snape said with a smirk._

_Harry stared for a moment, surprise clearly evident on his face. _"_Wait, Professor, did you just tell a joke?_" _Harry asked in disbelief._

"_Obviously,_" _Snape sneered. _

"_Merlin's beard! Severus Snape just told two jokes!_" _Harry sputtered as he began to laugh uncontrollably. His laughter shook Hermione awake._

_With her face buried on Harry's shoulder and her back to the rest of the room, she didn't notice Severus in her quarters. _"_Really, Harry, there's not a damn thing funny about this!_" _she grumbled, smacking him lightly on the chest._

_Still laughing, Harry sputtered, _"_No... I... He... Shite! Hermione, quit it!_" _He laughed harder and she began striking him in earnest. _"_Ow... alright... now Hermione stop that!_" _Harry yelped as he struggled with the angry witch on his lap. In her struggles the blanket fell the the floor. Harry quickly caught hold of both her wrists in one hand lifted her arms up, away from him, and pulled her struggling body against his to restrain her._

"_Damn it, Harry let me go!_" _she growled._

"_Hermione... wait a second..._" _Harry began._

"_Oh yes, Mr. Potter, I can see that you have this situation well handled._" _At the sound of Severus' voice Hermione froze._

_Blushing furiously she hissed at Harry, _"_Let me go!_" _He did and she scrambled up quickly and with a mumbled apology she ran for the bathroom._

_The two men stood in awkward silence. There were sounds of rushing around in the bathroom; a brush roughly attacking hair, the rustling of clothes, a heavy thump, a muffled grunt, and then the sound of water splashing in the sink. Hermione emerged a moment later, her hair pulled into a loose bun at the nape of her neck, and a bathrobe thrown over her pyjamas. She had scrubbed her face clean of tear tracks but there was no mistaking her red rimmed eyes or the distinct pinkness of her nose._

"_Good morning Severus, what brings you up her so early on a Saturday morning?_" _Hermione asked softly._

"_The Daily Prophet,_" _he answered simply._

_Her eyes misted briefly, she shook her head and cleared her throat, _"_Thank you Severus for your concern. Honestly, I'm not sure what to think right now, I want to believe that Ron would never do that to me. All Rita Skeeter has ever printed in the past has been lies, it would be odd for her, to have actually written some truth. Right now I am choosing to reserve judgment until I can talk to Ron._"

"_Hermione..._" _Harry began._

"_No, Harry, I'll see him tomorrow night at the All Hallow's Eve Party. I promise you one way or another I will find out the truth from him before the party is over. I promise you, I'm not going into this blind Harry. I have my suspicions and there is Skeeter's article to consider, but I can't go forward with this until I have all the facts. Though I was inclined to end the relationship before this, now that Skeeter has seen fit to air all Ron's dirty laundry I'll have to be a little more careful how I go about it. I refuse to be manipulated by that woman._"

_Both Harry and Severus seemed about to speak when there was a knock at Hermione's door._

"_Hermione? It's me Ginny, can I come in?_" _she called._

"_Well, aren't I popular this morning?_" _she muttered. _"_Yeah, sure come on in join the pity party,_" _she called to Ginny. _

_As she came in she seemed confused to see Severus in Hermione's room but gave a polite nod anyways. She was about to say something to Hermione when she finally noticed Harry. _

"_Harry!_" _she exclaimed joyfully. She ran past Hermione and Severus and launched herself into Harry's arms kissing him fervently. Harry wrapped his arms around Ginny, and for a moment, they seemed to forget they were not alone. Hermione cleared her throat loudly. Quickly remembering where they were, they stepped apart a bit, still holding hands and blushing. _

_Ginny turned to Hermione and trying to maintain some semblance of propriety she asked, _"_Did you get it?_"

_Hermione grimaced, _"_Yeah I got the Prophet this morning Ginny. And I'll tell you what I've already said to these two, all Rita Skeeter has ever printed has been lies._" _Ginny nodded. _"_Of course I'll see him tomorrow night and I'll find out the complete truth then._"

"_I'm glad you're not just immediately ready to think the worst of Ron. Skeeter's usually full of shite, but if my prat of a brother has cheated on you, I'll hex his bollocks off myself._" _Ginny grinned wickedly. Severus arched an eyebrow and Harry cringed slightly away from his fiancee. _"_Although, that wasn't what I meant. I meant did you get you and Ron's costumes yet? Mine was delivered early this morning, and I was hoping we could try them on together. And then we could work on the charms for Ron's. Though I have to say, in light of this mornings Prophet, it will be all the more enjoyable to see the reaction to his costume._" _Ginny chuckled maniacally. _

_Hermione faltered, _"_Um, yeah they're in my room, hold on I'll go get them._" _She turned quietly and walked back to her bedroom._

_As soon as Hermione closed her bedroom door, Ginny cast a Muffliato, turned to Harry and Severus, and said, _"_You two have already figured out that Ron really did cheat on her haven't you?_" _They both nodded. _"_She's only saying all that because she thinks the whole wizarding world will be upset if she breaks up with him. Well, Mum might, but I know I won't be. I don't think Hermione'll be all that heart broken. Her heart's not been in it for about six months now. I think she's probably known for even longer than that, but has been trying to spare everyone else's feelings. I say we save her from doing the noble thing of staying with him for everyone else's sake. So what were you two planning to do about it?_" _Ginny asked with a knowing smirk._

_Hermione took her time once she was in her room, to collect her thoughts as well as the costumes. She knew this day of reckoning would come. She had been fairly certain that Ron had been cheating on her. That he was caught by Rita in such a public fashion was merely the final nail in the coffin for their relationship. She had been hoping to break up privately, without the whole wizarding as their audience. With all the publicity from the article, that was no longer an option. _

_The summer before, about two months after the fall of Voldemort, she had gone to Australia and attempted, unsuccessfully, to restore her parents memories. She had gone to do some research at the Australian Ministry of Magic's main library, hoping to find more in-depth information about memory restoration. She had arranged to stay in Australia for two weeks and spent the next few days in their library. She was then distraught when not two days after her attempt they were in a fatal head on car collision. When Hermione found out, she had sent a Patronus to Harry and Ron. She was in shambles by the time Harry and the Weasleys arrived. While Ron did his best to comfort her, it was Harry's constant presence that had truly helped her recover. It was during that time that she and Harry had cemented the sibling-like bond that had begun in childhood. _

_She had called on Harry that morning because Harry was the closest thing to family that she had left and she needed his reassurance that she could survive even this. She felt uncertain and thought perhaps Molly, and whole the Weasley family was likely to turn on her if she and Ron broke up. She needed to know that she wouldn't lose Harry too, after all he was now the only _"_family_" _she had left. _

_She heaved a great sigh, and brushed away the fresh tears. From their earlier conversation, she felt fairly certain she would not lose Harry's friendship, or Ginny's for that matter. Ginny's offer to hex Ron, while not exactly surprising, was a welcome offer of support. She felt quite grateful for Harry and Ginny's comforting reassurances. _

_She was somewhat surprised to see Severus in her room though. They had developed an odd sort of friendship over the last year or so. After her parents death she had returned to England with little purpose. Looking for a project she could immerse herself in, she dove into helping Harry with Severus' case before the Wizengamot, she also decided to help Draco Malfoy as well. The cases were so overly publicized, it was a difficult go. Especially with Severus initially still in a potion-induced coma. Of course with Harry and Hermione's hard work, their adamant testimonies before the Wizengamot, Severus' memories, a vial of memories belonging to Dumbledore himself (found in the Headmaster's office), and Kingsley as temporary Minister they did finally have both Severus and Draco cleared of all charges. _

_After the trials, Harry had gone on to Auror training, Ron had decided to work with George in the shop till the Cannons held try outs and Hermione decided to go back to Hogwarts to complete her NEWTS. Harry and Ginny began seriously dating and were practically joined at the hip. Ron and Hermione had decided to take it a little slower. Ron had repeatedly tried to press Hermione into a more physical relationship but she had not felt comfortable going past a bit of snogging and petting. She was a virgin and was not quite ready for that to change. _

_October first of that year, Hogwarts was scheduled to reopen. In September, Minerva and Hermione had occasion to take tea together and had discussed at length Hermione's plan for the future. Minerva had been placed as Headmistress by the Board of Governors, and tasked with the responsibility of filling all the professorial vacancies. Professor Sprout, who had been injured in the battle, had decided to stay only temporarily to train Neville to take her place. Madam Hooch had been killed by a giant in the battle, and Ginny was to take her place after finishing her NEWTS. Minerva had sweet talked Slughorn into staying, his conditions being, all he was required to do was teach. He refused to be Head of House for the Slytherins or to brew to potions for Poppy. Severus would come back as Defense Against The Dark Arts professor, since he had finally been well enough to be released form St. Mungo's. His quarters still in the dungeons, he would return to his duties as Head of Slytherin and would brew the necessary potions for Poppy. A muggleborn, Hufflepuff, Evelyn Kimberley, who had been in Cedric's year, was going to be the new Muggle Studies Professor, as well as the new Head of House once Pomona left. Neville would be the Head of House for Gryffindor. The only vacancy left was Minerva's old post of Transfiguration. With a bit of manipulation she convinced Hermione to work through the year on both finishing her NEWTS and training to replace Minerva by the end of the year. _

_In the midst the chaos of the following year, with three student teachers, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville, Hogwarts had returned to as close to normal as it could ever be. The three of them were given their own common room and adjoining dorms. Minerva, hoping to ease their transition from student to Professor, had asked them to begin sitting with the staff. Hermione had taken to sitting on Severus' left, during the transition. She had been pleased to finally find someone as equally well read, who was more than willing to discuss and debate intellectual theory. Their discussions had ranged over a broad spectrum of topics, from potions, to charms, to politics, to philosophy, religion, and even, advances in muggle medical sciences. _

_Their erudite debates had begun at the end of a staff meeting in early November of that year. Severus had questioned her intelligence after observing her reading an article about Polyjuice, written by a man he deemed not worthy to hold the title of Potions Master. Their ensuing argument had nearly come to drawn wands before Headmistress McGonagall, herself had intervened, sending both Hermione and Severus to their respective quarters to cool off. After this nearly explosive disagreement, Severus seemed to find it a necessity to debate with Hermione on any number of occasions. He had even begun, as of the following school year, inviting Hermione to his quarters in the evenings to continue discussions begun at the dinner table. When Hermione had first entered his personal quarters, she had felt a bit awkward, that is until she saw his personal library. Seeing her covetous gaze, he reluctantly offered to allow her to read any tome she pleased, so long as she did not remove the books from his chambers. They spent many an evening together, embroiled in heated scholarly debate or simply reading together in front of the fire. _

_There remained however, one idiosyncrasy to their newfound civility. Severus, while tolerant of Hermione's use of his given name, refused her frequent requests that he do the same for her. She understood the desire for formality in front of the students, but he adamantly refused to use her first name, even in private. It bothered her to no end. She had heard him over the course of the past year, use the first name of every other staff member, including Neville and Ginny. Of course he had called Ginny, Ginerva, but still, she was Professor Granger, or simply Granger when he was aggravated. _

"_Hermione?_" _Ginny called, concern in her voice. _"_Are you alright in there?_"

_Ginny's voice had shook her from her musings, she took a deep breath to clear her wandering thoughts. _"_Yeah, I'm fine I'll be out in a moment._"

_It was quite ironic, here her relationship with Ron was falling apart all around her, and her thoughts were drifting to the question of why Severus refused to use her first name. It was just maddeningly unhelpful. _

_Picking up the costume boxes from her bedside table she tapped them with her wand, they returned to their original sizes as she walked back out to the sitting room to join the others. _

"_Alright we'll do it your way then!_" _Harry groaned. As Hermione entered her sitting room she found Severus standing stiffly, facing the floo, his back to Harry and Ginny. Ginny sat on the sofa pointedly staring up at the ceiling. Harry stood on the other side of the room, one hand fisted in his hair, as he glared at her rug as though it had done him some great personal wrong. _

"_What's going on in here?_" _Hermione asked._

_Turning towards her Severus sighed in frustration, _"_Thank Circe, you've finally decided to join us, Granger. If I have to listen to one more moment of debate about the Potter-Weasley wedding plans, I may cast myself off the Astronomy Tower._"

"_Hermione,_" _she requested patiently. When he gave no response she sighed. _"_I'm sorry you had to hear all that, Severus._" _Turning to Harry she asked, _"_Is Ginny still trying to convince you to invite the Dursleys?_" _Harry nodded. _"_Why don't you two go on ahead to Ginny's quarters and I'll be there shortly after I get dressed._"

_With an overly large sigh Harry said, _"_Alright Mum, sending us to our room for fighting._" _He rolled his eyes for dramatic effect._

_Hermione fisted her hands on her hips and said in a fake motherly tone, _"_Harry James Potter, don't you roll your eyes at me!_" _At which the three of them began to laugh uproariously. Severus merely smirked and arched one eyebrow. _

_Ginny recovered first, hopping up from the sofa she grabbed the costume boxes from Hermione with one hand and Harry's hand with the other. She announced mockingly, _"_Come on Harry, I think she's serious! We'd better hurry up to my room before she grounds us!_" _Harry and Ginny then ran out of the room in a fit of laughter. _

_As their laughter faded down the hall after them, Hermione sighed, _"_This has been a trying morning. I'm going to fix some tea would you care for some, Severus?_"

"_Won't your 'children' be wondering where 'Dearest Mummy' is?_" _Severus smirked._

"_I'm certain Ginny will find a way to keep Harry sufficiently entertained. And as such, I'd rather give them some time so I will not intrude on something I'd rather not witness._" _Severus chuckled. _"_So would you like to join me for a cuppa?_" _He nodded and followed Hermione into the small kitchenette as she fixed the tea and continued to prattle on. _"_Honestly, I'd like to take a few moments before I face the ginger inquisition. Ginny means well, but once I go up to her rooms, she'll end up dissecting every moment of my relationship with Ron. She'll either want all the details that she feels I've been holding back, or she'll spend the whole time bashing Ron's character in attempt to make me feel better. I can't blame her though. Really all this is my own fault. Of course, I should have ended the relationship months ago, when I had my first real suspicions, but I didn't and now I'm stuck. I hate feeling forced into things. Stupid Rita Skeeter! Stupid Ron! Stupid me, for that matter! Argh! It just make me so ANGRY!_"

_Hermione had become more and more irate as she went on and as she shouted the last bit she flung her hand out and knocked the kettle full of boiling water on her self. _"_Shite!_" _she moaned. _

_Severus was immediately at her side. He quickly pulled off the sodden bathrobe, cast a cooling charm on her already reddening skin, and a drying charm on her camisole. The top of her camisole had been soaked through with the boiling water. She stumbled backwards, hit the counter behind her, and slid down. Hermione looked down and moaned, her neck and the tops of her breasts were bright red and already beginning to blister. Severus knelt beside her and cast a diagnostic spell over her burns._

"_Do you have any burn salve in your quarters? This needs to be treated immediately so that it will not scar,_" _Severus asked softly._

_Hermione nodded. _"_It's in my medicine drawer in the bathroom._"

_Severus pointed his wand toward the bathroom. _"_Accio burn salve._" _There was a rattling in the bathroom, and then the burn salve flew through the room and into his waiting hand. Without a second thought he opened the jar, scooped out of the orange salve, and began spreading it on her neck and the tops of her breasts. He softly brushed the thin straps of her camisole off her shoulders, nearly exposing the whole of her breasts. _

_Hermione felt her body react to the gentle pressure of his strong hands as they smoothed the salve over her tender overheated skin. Her breathing became shallow and rapid, her nipples hardened and warmth pooled below her navel. She blushed furiously. He was so close, so intent on treating her burns, he didn't seem to have noticed her physical reaction to him. His dark hair curtained his face, obscuring it from her anxious perusal. She reached up and softly brushed the hair back away from his face and tucked it behind his ear. _"_Severus...,_" _she whispered, as her hand came to rest on the back of his neck._

_His hands stilled at the sound of her horse whisper. Panic struck him, as he thought that perhaps he had injured her further. He raised his eyes to meet hers. Instead of the pain he expected to see reflected in her eyes, he saw a deep hunger. His chest constricted, she caught her bottom lip between her teeth and began to worry at it. She was such a fusion of innocence and desire. He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped off the remaining salve, as he tried to reign in his building need. He had been battling with his ever increasing desire for the beguiling, young woman for the last few months. He had, in the midst of this struggle, come to lay aside his near idol worship of Lily. For what place in his heart, could a long dead, unforgiving woman hold, when a live woman who truly cared for him was looking at him like that. As much as he desired her though, this was not the time nor the place. She was injured, and had not yet rid herself of the Weasley brat. His traitorous body disagreed. She sat before him in a small camisole, the straps pushed off her shoulders, the rest of the shirt (if you could really call the soft scrap of material that) barely covering her breasts and abdomen. Her pyjama shorts were so short they were barely more than knickers. He was unsure how she could truly want such an scarred old git like himself. He gazed at her as he contemplated his next move._

_Her hand dropped listlessly to her lap. Tears misted in her eyes. In her mind, his hesitation equaled rejection. She turned away from his intense scrutiny. She neither wanted him to see the tears in her eyes, nor see the rejection in his. She quickly pushed away from the ground, wincing slightly as the sensitive skin pulled a bit at her sudden movement. She stood with her back to him as she pulled the straps back up to rest on her reddened shoulders. He stood quietly, replacing the lid, and placing the jar on the counter behind her. He struggled, knowing that he had missed some opportunity, but still unsure of what to say. Her body shook with silent sobs. _

_He carefully wrapped the long fingers of one hand around her upper arm as he attempted to make her turn to face him. _"_Professor Granger..._" _he began._

"_No!_" _She turned abruptly. She stepped closer, placing herself mere inches from him. Her face flushed, she began poking him in the chest, hard. _"_My name is Hermione!_" _she demanded. _"_You can do me at least that courtesy, Severus Snape!_" _Then just as quickly as her ire had rose, it fled. She was then terribly unsure of herself, standing so close to him. Again she chewed roughly on her bottom lip. _

_He gazed down at her now doubt-filled face. Gone was the raging Gryffindor, she seemed more like a startled little rabbit, ready to flee at any sudden movement. _

_He slowly gently cupped her cheek in his hand and ran the pad of his thumb over her much abused lower lip. _"_You should not injure yourself so..._" _his voice was a low rumbling purr. He leaned closer, his face inches from hers. _"..._Hermione,_" _he whispered, as he closed the distance between them. He kissed her with a careful tenderness, his lips moving ever so softly against hers._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Sorry to end it there, but this part was getting way too long. I had to split it into two parts and this seemed to be the best place to split it. The rest of this scene, the All Hallow's Eve party and the confrontation with Ron are coming up. I already have the rest of it hand written, it's simply a matter of typing it and, formatting it. Oh, and don't worry we shall return to Draco and Severus after the rest of this flashback. I felt it was an important time to understand the beginning of their relationship.

PS: Did anyone catch the random non-HP movie quote?


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